what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
