I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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