I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
