all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Randomize
