I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
