Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
