My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
