I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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