It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
