do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
