How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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