That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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