He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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