honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
