Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
