She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
