Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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