i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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