none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
