Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
where does the pee come out of this thing
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
