doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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