I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
