I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize