Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
