the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
