I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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