There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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