we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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