sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
