I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
