Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
