i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
The air taste purple.
Randomize