Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
