Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
