Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
