you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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