i permit you to call me
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
