3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize