yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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