lets start a swedish sibling band together
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
