I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
