He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize