My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
