All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
