Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
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