also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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