I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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