it was like eating out sand paper
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
