i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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