Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
